Holiday cheer (12/5/98)
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The Waterboy. [Frank Coraci, 1998.]
Adam Sandler plays a cretin who miraculously makes good. One must suppose this is not a stretch.
Detective. [Jean-Luc Godard, 1985.]
Paris. A hotel. A detective. A mystery. Guns, money, mobsters. A boxer gorges himself on chocolate. A braless girl takes her shirt off and puts another on; takes her shirt off and puts another on. No one seems to notice, probably because she is sitting next to the television. Ill KO Tiger Jones! the fighter exclaims. But isnt he Tiger Jones? a girl asks. A champion always fights himself, his manager replies. We are taking Sicily as a metaphor, Uncle William is saying in the next room. A girl bursts into tears. Why are pornographic movies called X-rated? a girl asks. Why X? as in mathematics. Exactly, someone answers, off. Oh yes, she says after a pause. The unknown. You think the killer will be back? History keeps repeating. Its one long stammer. Room service sends up a dead rat on a plate. Ah, young girls breasts... a man is sighing. A cut. A woman is folding a wad of bills. Ah, mens money... . Nobody does it better; nobody ever did.
Les Vampires. [Louis Feuillade, 1915/1916.]
A miraculous survival from the dawn of the cinema, a seven-hour serial shot on location in the streets of Paris during the First World War about a blackgarbed company of gangsters led by a succession of criminal masterminds [Feuillade kept killing them off, I think to head off contract renegotiations] but undoubtedly starring the archtypical femme fatale, Irma Vep. [Yes, its an anagram.] A favorite of the Surrealists, and you can certainly see why: fabulous, sinister, beautiful, inspiring. Available at last on video [Ive looked in vain for years]; check it out.
Hugo Pool. [Robery Downey, 1997.]
Robert Downey Senior directs like an actor; Robert Downey Junior acts like a director. Malcolm McDowell has a jones for horse; Cathy Moriarty has a jones for the horses. Alyssa Milano has a blue Chevy truck and Sean Penn has a pair of blue suede shoes. Ill pass on the shoes, the junk, and the sport of kings; but tell the babe to leave the engine running.
____________Booger nights (11/10/98)