Watch out for that tree (7/18/97)
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Vegas Vacation . [Stephen Kessler,1997.]
Chevy Chase takes the wife and kids to Vegas. Never before having stooped so low as to view one of this interminable series, I’m not ashamed to admit that this one wasn’t particularly unfunny. — The morals, presumably, are that one should never sit down at a blackjack table if Wally Shawn is dealing; and that one would be well-advised to avoid any dumb comedy that doesn’t feature Randy Quaid.
Beverly Hills Ninja. [Dennis Dugan, 1997.]
Chris Farley, the legendary Great White Ninja, journeys from his native dojo to faroff Los Angeles to rescue Nicollette Sheridan from some indistinct menace [I think they were supposed to be counterfeiters, but I wasn’t paying attention], stepping on every bananapeel in the hemisphere in the process. Mr. Farley sees to have insisted, I think rightly, on gaining credit for having performed some of his own stunts: who says fat boys can’t dance?
Adrenaline. [Albert Pyun, 1996.]
Cops in biological-warfare outfits chase a mutant cannibal through urban ruins which suggest the Roman catacombs but apparently represent Bohemia and Bucharest instead. Subtitled “Feel The Rush”, as indeed I did: so fervent was my response, in fact, that I passed out in the middle of the chase and never did figure out how Natasha Henstridge got out of this movie alive. — A better question, and one which I trust she’s putting to her agent with the aid of a Zippo lighter and a cattle prod, is how she got into this movie in the first place. I wish her better luck with
Species II [now in development.]
____________Take two (7/7/97)
